Camping Bled

20 Things I’ve noticed whilst touring Europe in a motorhome

Italian wives

Italian wives always nag their husbands about how they park the motorhome. At first I would feel sorry for the poor chap but now this behaviour has become my ‘entertainment’. As soon as I see an Italian motorhome enter the campsite it’s a signal to pull up a chair, grab a beer and watch a woman verbally abuse her spouse.

Lack of traffic

Compared to what we Brits have to contend with at home, Europeans have no idea what heavy traffic is like.

Speedos

Speedos (budgie smugglers) are still the preferred beach attire amongst European men.Europop

Europop

European ‘pop’ music is for the most part complete drivel.

Chris Rea & Croatia

Chris Rea seems really popular in Croatia. Every time I enter a supermarket one of his songs seems to be playing.

Italians & Car Parks

Italian motorhomers don’t seem fussy about location. They will happily spend a week in a car park if that car park is somewhere other than their hometown.

They don’t like the English

The English are not universally popular in Europe but the Dutch seem to like us. If you want to be popular with all nationalities cover your motorhome in Scottish flags as mine is (previous owner was Scottish). I think much of this friendly behaviour towards Scots is in the hope you are carrying large quantities of whisky.

Rule takers & breakers      

The Germans, Swiss and Austrians like to live by a set of rules. The Italians on the other hand think rules are for wimps and break as many as possible.

Good weather = low stress     

It’s hard to be stressed when the sun is shining and you live next to the sea.

Impossible to find cheddar cheese 

Get to like Gouda or Emmantal as it’s impossible to find extra mature cheddar.

Polish dogs walk themselves 

Dogs are allowed to roam the streets in Poland. These are not strays as they look well groomed and have collars.

Dacia cars 

Whilst the Trabant is an awful car my award for ‘Shittiest Car In Europe’ has to go to any Dacia model. Whoever designs these cars should be shot. The car and the company logo have no personality whatsoever.

Clackers  

The summer toy craze of 2010 in Slovenia and Croatia seems to be 2 balls on a string that you smash together as fast as possible. It sounds like a woodpecker from a distance.

More smokers 

Smoking is still popular in Europe, certainly more so than in the UK.

Croatian drinks 

The Croatian drinks Istra Bitters and Pelikovac are truly awful.

Sailor shirts 

In every European town close to the sea you will find a shop selling striped sailor shirts.

Hotel Bellevue everywhere 

It seems every town in Europe has a Hotel Bellevue.

GPS data less accurate  

Your GPS which has always behaved impeccably in the UK will suddenly do some strange things in Europe.

Using a mobile while driving  

All Italians talk on their mobile phones whilst driving, even if they own a scooter.

Turkish toilets 

Turkish style toilets are still quite common on some European campsites. In Italy when you do find a traditional toilet don’t expect a toilet seat or toilet paper.

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9 thoughts on “20 Things I’ve noticed whilst touring Europe in a motorhome”

  1. Re Point 13 – you seem to be describing ‘clackers’ that were very popular in the UK in the early 70’s…. I think that they fell out of favour after a number of kids broke their wrists whilst using them and they were eventually banned!

    They tried to reintroduce them, supposedly safer versions, a few years ago…… a woman at the ‘health & safety scared-to-death’ place I worked at then brought some in her kids had got, and the manager’s face was priceless…. he nearly collapsed on the spot!

  2. You’re so interesting! I do not believe I have read anything like this before. So great to discover somebody with a few original thoughts on this issue. Seriously.. thank you for starting this up. This web site is one thing that’s needed on the internet, someone
    with a little originality!

  3. I referred in my comment previously about 10 things you had noticed – I meant ten of course.

    BTW you ‘have’ to wear ‘speedos’ in Italy (and other countries I am told) they do not allow shorts in public pools… weird 😉

  4. Yes I’ve also been told that swimming shorts are banned in some places in Europe. My understanding is that it’s for hygiene reasons but recently someone told me that certain things that live in the sea and can sting could swim up your shorts leg and reach the ‘middle wicket’ whereas tight fitting speedos offer more protection to the ‘old chap’.

    All the best
    Gary
    The Motorhome Vagabond

  5. The French seem to insist on Speedo type swim wear in pools etc. We asked about this and was told that it is for hygiene. For example, put on a pair of “Bermuda” type shorts in the morning, wear them most of the day, dive in the pool etc. The shorts have been worn for a while, have sat on walls, the ground and so on, but the expectation was the Speedos would be put on for swimming and then removed. I had never thought about something going up the leg!

  6. Hi Russell,

    Yes that makes sense. I know that my own swimming shorts are really comfortable and I might well wear them all day. When are you next on Skype? Not seen you recently when I’ve been logged on.

    Gary
    The Motorhome Vagabond

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